Anger Management....

ANGER....sucha a powerful word....and its effects are not any less powerful either....it is an emotion that explodes when someone frightens us, threatens us, betrays, obstructs, disregards us, or harms us in some way....it never brings us any good....in fact it does more harm....but yet, many of us still succumb to it even though we know what harms it can do....I personally try to hold back my anger at any cause....i dont like what it makes me turn into....dont have a liking for screaming at people as i dont like people screaming at me either....i dont think anyone has the right to scream at anyone at all for that matter of fact....but then, it does get my irritate meter up to the limit....

im only human after all....i do loose my temper at times....hehe....sad but true....but then i dont let go on those who made me angry....but instead on those who irritate me when im angry....i know its bad....but hey, what am i to do....just dont irritate me when im trying to let off some steam....give me my space and all will be fine in half an hour....but alas, some still would not get the point....and would still irritate me only to result in me showing my anger on them....

however, i wont say i have a temper problem....for it takes alot of shit to get my temper in action....hehe....but i have seen loads of individual with temper problems....and some with very bad temper problem....it is kind of sad how they just scream at others when the true fact is probably that they are just frustrated with themsleves....i witnessed such a situation a few days back....this person, a guy, was eating with his partner at a food joint....when suddenly he spilled his drink glass over the table and onto himself....what would he have done? want to take a wild guess? hehe....

yeah, you are right....he started screaming at his partner like it was her fault that he spilled the drink....she just sat quietly and looked at him while he screamed his lungs out at her in public....inappropriate?? you bet....but still things like this happens everyday....probably these angry people should attend anger management classes to control their mental problem with temper....and save the rest of us from having to deal with their anger and public humiliation....not forgetting the emotional hurt that comes with it....

i guess not many realise what effects they leave on people with their temper....not many are well educated on how they should respect others and their feelings....for if they were, i dont think we would have a problem here....there was this story that i once read that i felt described the effects of anger....and i think i would shared it with you all here....i dont have the actual story currently....but il rewrite it again in my own words with what i remember....hehe....

there was once a boy who had a very bad temper problem....he would get angry at anything and at anyone....his level of tolerance was very low and he always got angry at even the smallest things.....he would scream, shout, and even curse when he was angry....his actions wasnt liked by the people around him but there was nothing they could do or say because he wouldnt listen and he couldnt control his temper....any effort from them would only get his temper up....

so one day, the father of this boy gave him a big box wrapped up as a present....they boy was surprised as it was not his birthday or any other special occation to receive a present....his father asked him to open it and what he found inside was a bag of nails and along with it a hammer....the boy was a little puzzled and could not understand the significance of the present....noticing the boy's puzzled face.....the father said,

"my dear son....this is a gift from me to you....i have noticed that you have a problem with your temper and im hoping this gift will help you to learn how to control your temper....so everytime after this....the moment you feel angry....i want you to take these nails and the hammer and go to the back fence of the house....i want you to hammer a nail into that fence for each time you loose your temper....if the day ever comes, that you do not need to hammer any nails anymore into the fence....inform me of that day...."

the boy did not understand the motif of his father....but he nodded his head and agreed to his fathers request....so the next day, the boy lost his temper 60 times and nailed 60 nails into the fence....the wood of the fence was hard and driving the nails into it was a tiring job....however, to stick to his word with his father....he continued with it....as time passed the amount of nails he hammered into the fence got lesser by the day....he was learning to control his temper because he did not enjoy hammering the nails into the hard wood of the fence....day by day the nails got less....until finally, he did not have to hammer any nails into the wood again....he has managed to control his temper and deal with things calmly....excited with his achievement, he went to his father to inform him of his success in controlling his temper....

the father smiled when he was told of his sons achievements....he asked the boy to take him to the fence where all the nails were hammered into....upon reaching the place, the father looked at the fence and the amount of nails in it....the father now asked the boy to remove all the nails from the fence as he did not need them anymore....the son did not understand his fathers intentions again but he did as his father had asked him to....removing the nail wasnt much of a problem for him....the nails came out easily when he pulled them out....however, due to the number of nails....he took some time before he managed to pull out every nail he has hammered into the fence....upon completing his work....he called his father again to inform him....the father came and looked at the fence....he then said,

"look at the fence....does it look the same as before you nailed all those nails into it?? the nails is your temper and anger....the fence is the people you show your temper to....all this time, you have showed so much of your temper to the people....you have learnt to control your temper and manage to remove all the nails you have hammered from the people with your appology and effort to make up....however, as you can see....the nails may not be there anymore but the scars always will remain....the fence will never be the same again....it will be with the scars from the nails for the rest of its lifetime....and the same goes with the people as well....the might have forgien you and gotten over it....but the damage and hurt you have caused them will remain and live with them till the end of their lives....they would never be the same people that you have know before...."

the boy now understood what his father said and the reason of the gift....he might be a changed person but the effects of his past will remain with the people who were affected...and though he regretted his actions, there was no way for him to turn back time and make things better....

that story really did make me think....and i hope it got you all thinking as well....anger gets us to no where....it only makes people upset and bitter....and what you do or say in anger might not be your true intentions....but you would not be able to take it back and the effect from it will forever remain....so if you really have a temper problem, do seek help for it....find some way to keep your temper under control....it would help in making you a better person as well as keeping others around you happy....you also would not do or say something that you might regret later on for....

so the next time you feel angry and think you cant control your temper and feel like screaming....take a deep breath....tell the person involved you need some time to yourself....and walk away....take a long walk or listen to some music....if food helps then by all means, go and indulge yourself....hehe....get back to the matter only after you have cooled down and can think rationally....because screaming and breaking stuff wont get you anywhere.... instead it might cause you to do something you would live to regret....so peepz....take a chill pill and live life happy....anger and tension is just a waste of energy and feelings....it wont make things better....it will only make things worse....peace out